Monday, 23 March 2009
Not my problem
Today was pretty awesome despite the crap start. Typically just when i was about to give up on everyone at that school they become my friends. Someone up there doesn't want me to give up on people yet... I am going to the college I've always wanted to go to, i have friends and i am over him. Life is pretty good right now. But things got a lot worse before they got better... All in the space of a day! I honestly thought i wouldn't be here to write this today... I am so glad that i am. I'm not giving up this time. I'm staying here for the long haul. There are so many things i want to do, so many places i want to see, i could miss out on all of that if i give up. Now i simply feel sorry for him. Because he can't deal with a lot of things. I found out today that he dropped one of his courses because he couldn't cope with it, also he couldn't cope with me... What can that boy cope with?! Oh well, it's so not my problem anymore!! Finally!!!!!
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poetry of the damned
It's not fair.
I don't know who i am.
Why do i feel this way?
I'm never able to be myself. Not really.
There's always a piece locked away.
A secret i won't ever say.
A lie i'll never reveal.
I made a mistake. It cost me everything.
I'll never be the same again.
No one knows who i really am.
He thought he knew me, but he didn't.
She thought she saw me, but she didn't.
What they thought they knew and saw was a shadow of what was real.
Of what i really feel.
I'll never fit in. I'm an outsider. For that i thank God everyday!
Who wants to be cool when that includes getting drunk, smoking and screwing around?
But why does being an outsider have to be so hard?
I am different. More different than you know.
That's the point really... You will never know. Because i will never tell.
untitled
perseverance is what they say my strength is
They must be right
because i got hurt again tonight
Yet i'm still ready to love
Rebound is my second name
But not in the way you might think
I wish i could hate you
But i don't have the strength
One day my heart will not be able to hold on anymore
will not react to heartbreak with immunity
i think today is that day.
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