I will...

I will live
I will die.
I will laugh
I will cry.
But i won't wait for you again
In the rain
Like i did last night.
Goodbye.

Friday, 29 May 2009

music, exams yadda, yadda, yadda...

Only a couple of days then it's the end of exams! Finally! Although it seems as if no time has passed at all, now all i will have to do is see if i regret not studying much or praise the times i did (In case you don't know my psycho babble by now that's my way of saying I'll just have to wait about my results!) Not much else to write except that i have been listening to a lot of music lately and the songs mean a lot to me because they either A) inspire me or B) I can relate to them as if I had wrote them (which i didn't) Oh well, back to school Monday! Then on Thursday all the exams will be done and dusted... Yay?

Tuesday, 26 May 2009

Making my mind up

I have chosen a college! I have chosen to be on my own and even though i will still miss him and what we had sometimes i have decided to let go and finally move on. I have decided to live life and grab every opportunity. I have decided to let the past go and to try and heal my heart which has been broken for too long now. I have decided to be me.

Monday, 25 May 2009

Birthdays

In my entire life i have probably managed to celebrate three birthdays, one celebration was late so it doesn't really count. that would be great if i was three years old, but I'm not. I have never really celebrated my birthday, even though i have wanted to, why should this year be any different?

Sunday, 24 May 2009

JB

I was in Portsmouth for the john Barrowman 09 UK tour! The show was amazing! He is amazing! Now i can say that I've been there AND got the t-shirt! Only got in now and I'm tired but it was all worth it! THANK YOU JOHN FOR A WONDERFUL NIGHT! YOU'RE FABULOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!

poetry of the damned


It's not fair.
I don't know who i am.
Why do i feel this way?
I'm never able to be myself. Not really.
There's always a piece locked away.
A secret i won't ever say.
A lie i'll never reveal.
I made a mistake. It cost me everything.
I'll never be the same again.
No one knows who i really am.
He thought he knew me, but he didn't.
She thought she saw me, but she didn't.
What they thought they knew and saw was a shadow of what was real.
Of what i really feel.
I'll never fit in. I'm an outsider. For that i thank God everyday!
Who wants to be cool when that includes getting drunk, smoking and screwing around?
But why does being an outsider have to be so hard?
I am different. More different than you know.
That's the point really... You will never know. Because i will never tell.

untitled


perseverance is what they say my strength is
They must be right
because i got hurt again tonight
Yet i'm still ready to love
Rebound is my second name
But not in the way you might think
I wish i could hate you
But i don't have the strength
One day my heart will not be able to hold on anymore
will not react to heartbreak with immunity
i think today is that day.