You and She

Your best friend's in trouble, she loves you and feels more for you than you can feel for her, but in your own way you love her too. She wants you to stay and just listen, but even that feels too much, she brings back memories best forgotten. She's dying right in front of your eyes. She's said goodbye, she meant it at the time but she didn't go through with it, thank god right? But it's getting too much, you feel like you're drowning, like you're dying with her. She offers you a way out. You wouldn't have thought of it before, but you take it. She goes back on it, says she actually wants you to stay, but you can't, you're confused, mixed up. Things slip out. You ignore her because it's for the best. You make up with her, the next day she rants at you because you're cold and distant but it's too soon for you to talk about what happened. She storms off, she apologises but the stress has put you through too much. You decide to switch off and pretend she isn't there. Months later you see her again, she looks like a ghost, you want to reach out and hug her but you can't. You mumble a thanks when she lets you pass in the corridor. Next day she is glowing, laughing and you only see a glimpse of the old her, the one that nearly got away. You steal glimpses at her to see if she's really there, she has changed so much and achieved so much. You don't think she even knows you exist, you won't see her ever again. Should you talk to her or shouldn't you? You can't decide.
Please leave comments as to what you think of this character! I really want to know!

Thoughts happening in wonderland.

Nothing has happened that is entirely important so far. Except that i got through two more levels of the computer game I'm currently addicted to so that's good... Soooo bored at the moment. Nothing is happening and the heat is weighing down on me, bring on the winter wonderland! ha ha. Ooh, music I'm listening to just turned to a sad song, making me depressed so I'm gonna skip it... That's better. Now I'm listening to a dance-y sort of tune. Hee hee. I'm just writing whatever comes into my mind. OK better go because my thoughts are probably best left unpublished. Ha ha.

Cancelled plans

I cannot believe some people! You make plans, you get ready and just as you're about to step out the door, you get a text to say "oh can't make it, sorry" They're explanation? "I'm busy". ARGH! It pisses me off so much. I went to school today only one of my friends were there. I had just missed him, probably for the best, i don't know where we stand and seeing as I'll never see him again and have changed my number so many times since we last spoke so he can't contact me, it's probably for the best we don't start talking now. I just want to know if he's sorry, y'know? But it doesn't matter now because I'm starting a whole new life, I'm different, he's different. We would not fit in each others worlds anymore even if we did kiss and make up... But i forgive him. I am no longer angry or upset or anything. He's... We're just a memory.

Fabulous success

My birthday was fabby fab fab (note to self: NEVER say that again!) Got everything i wanted and had a little party with my mates! Been listening to a lot of music lately and i have a project to work on, will let you know the info as soon as i get the green light on it. If it falls through i don't want to seem a complete idiot so it won't be mentioned until it is a success!

Birthday blues ;)

Happy birthday to me! So far a great day. Got a card through the post from my school, everyone signed it including him! But i am so not gonna think about it because he is not in my life plan anymore and i am not leting him ruin my big day! I'll let you know how the rest of the day goes!

It's a love thing...

I don't know what i want. Do i want a true best friend who wouldn't run away at the first sign of trouble or do i want a relationship with a self absorbed but absolutely amazing person? Why can't i have both?