I will...

I will live
I will die.
I will laugh
I will cry.
But i won't wait for you again
In the rain
Like i did last night.
Goodbye.

Monday, 30 March 2009

Vent

Well, never thought i would say this but the People at my school are actually quite fun. I have a feeling that i got on his nerves today, it kinda cheered me up! I know that makes me sound mean but after all the shit he has put me through can you blame me? What it is is that he always thinks that he's better than me, especially at math but today we were told we were at the same level in math! The look on his face was hilarious but also hurtful. Why can't he be happy that I'm finally getting somewhere in life? Come to think of it, it must have been a great ego boost having a girl mope and lose herself over him, now that boost is gone... It's gotta sting. Not to mention everyone kept saying how great i looked with my new hair, funny thing is he got a hair cut too (He usually has quite floppy hair but today it was a lot shorter) and nobody even mentioned it... I think that got on his nerves as well. Still turning my back to him whenever he walks into a room or when he sits next to me in math. We looked at each other at the same time and looked away at the same time in assembly, the synchronization was kinda cool. His voice, so all knowing and bossy really got on my nerves today. This is one long, moaning post. But i feel a little better for venting.

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poetry of the damned


It's not fair.
I don't know who i am.
Why do i feel this way?
I'm never able to be myself. Not really.
There's always a piece locked away.
A secret i won't ever say.
A lie i'll never reveal.
I made a mistake. It cost me everything.
I'll never be the same again.
No one knows who i really am.
He thought he knew me, but he didn't.
She thought she saw me, but she didn't.
What they thought they knew and saw was a shadow of what was real.
Of what i really feel.
I'll never fit in. I'm an outsider. For that i thank God everyday!
Who wants to be cool when that includes getting drunk, smoking and screwing around?
But why does being an outsider have to be so hard?
I am different. More different than you know.
That's the point really... You will never know. Because i will never tell.

untitled


perseverance is what they say my strength is
They must be right
because i got hurt again tonight
Yet i'm still ready to love
Rebound is my second name
But not in the way you might think
I wish i could hate you
But i don't have the strength
One day my heart will not be able to hold on anymore
will not react to heartbreak with immunity
i think today is that day.